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[08 Mar 2005|08:07pm] |
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THE END
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[28 Feb 2005|07:05pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 drained |
] |
nature created us
nature is our "god"
we have defied nature
we have pissed off our "god"
there's a super volcano underneath yellowstone national park
when it erupts america will no longer exist
this is what i live for...
i feel so inspired
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[27 Feb 2005|08:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 silly |
] |
me and ravyn...
=)
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[26 Feb 2005|03:05pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 productive |
] |
| [ |
music |
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modest mouse... |
] |
The days get shorter and the nights get cold.
I like the autumn but this place is getting old...
I pack up my belongings and I head for the coast.
It might not be a lot but I feel like I'm making the most.
The days get longer and the nights smell green.
I guess it's not surprising but it's spring and I should leave...
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[20 Feb 2005|07:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 thoughtful |
] |
I'm in a strange mood...
I crave Chocolate, Sex and a Child of my own...
I feel so deprived...
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[19 Feb 2005|08:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 cheerful |
] |
| [ |
music |
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YAY half baked is on... |
] |
she keeps on asking
Do you think it hurts much to die?
It's hurting so much more to stay alive now
She's going to find out how much it hurts to die...
When I came back from death
it was morning
the back door was open
and one of the buttons of my shirt had
disappeared.
-Derick Thomson
Return From Death
Should not every apartment in which man dwells be lofty enough to create some obscurity overhead, where flickering shadows may play at evening about the rafters?
-Henry David Thoreau
Walden
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[18 Feb 2005|05:30pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 morose |
] |
Ha HA!...wait, get this...
i'm hygiene leader...
...
=)
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| OFOTCN |
[15 Feb 2005|01:02pm] |
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"I'm fruther off than I've ever been. This is what it's like to be dead. I guess this is what it's like to be a Vegetable; you lose yourslef in the fog. You don't move. They feed your body till it finally stops eating; then they burn it. It's not so bad. There's no pain. I don't feel much of anything other than a touch of chill I figure will pass in time."
...another passage from another book...
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[15 Feb 2005|09:27am] |
and i'm just looking at the floor
just looking at the floor
yeah i look at the floor
and i'm starting to laugh
like an animal in pain
and i've got blood on my hands
and i've got hands in my brain
and the first short retch
leaves me gasping for more
and i stagger over screaming
on my way to the floor
and i'm back on my back
with the lights and the lies in my eyes
and the colour and the music's too loud
and my head's all the wrong size
so here i go
here i go again...
and the way the rain comes down hard
that's the way i feel inside...
i can't take it anymore
this it i've become
this is it like i get
when my life's going numb
i just keep moving my mouth
i just keep moving my feet
i say i'm loving you to death
like i'm losing my breath
and all the smiles that i wear
and all the games that i play
and all the drinks that i mix
and i drink until i'm sick
and all the faces that i make
and all the shapes that i throw
and all the people i meet
and all the words that i know
makes me sick to the heart
oh i feel so tired...
and the way the rain comes down hard
that's how i fell inside...
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[14 Feb 2005|02:48pm] |
Haunted
by CHUCK PALAHNIUK
Release Date: May 17, 2005
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| with the right kind of eyes |
[13 Feb 2005|02:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
accomplished |
] |
| [ |
music |
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lonesome crowded west |
] |
Remember what the door mouse said: Feed Your Head...
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[11 Feb 2005|08:12pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 blah |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
fear and loathing in lost vegas... |
] |
Do you know what would happen if my mom used fabric softener? I'd DIE.
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[10 Feb 2005|07:39pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 bitchy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
ouch |
] |
it's one of those moments
bloody screaming on the inside...
it's rather painful
"So she was turned away/To hide her face, her lips, her guilt among the trees/Even their leaves, to haunt caves of the forest/To feed her love on melancholy sorrow/Which, sleepless, turned her body to a shade/ First pale and wrinkled, then a sheet of air/Then bones, which some say turned to thin-worn rocks/And last her voice remained. Vanished in forest/ Far from her usual walks on hills and valleys/She's heard by all who call;her voice has life..."
House of Leaves
Page 42
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[09 Feb 2005|07:42pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
apathetic |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
one flew over the cuckoos nest... |
] |
"You see--it's a lotta baloney. It's all a lotta baloney. That's all it is nothin but a lotta baloney. Ya see, I can't help it, I can't--don't ya see? I was born dead. Not you. You wasn't born dead. Ahhh it's been hard...
Ahhhh, I...tell...ya...I tell YOU. I can't help it. I was born a miscarriage. I had so many insults I died. I was born dead. I can't help it. I'm tired. I'm give out trying. You got chances. I had so many insults i was born dead. You got it easy. I was born dead and life was hard. I'm tired. I'm tired out talking and standing up. I been dead fifty-five YEARS.
I'm...tired...
...aw-ful tired."
"Hard livin's my pleasure, my money's my own, and them that dont like me, they can leave me alone."
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[08 Feb 2005|06:45pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
blank |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
homeo apathy |
] |
hiding behind horoscopes is also swell...
Capricorn
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
You absolutely don't recognize yourself lately, do you? Yesterday, you were fighting the system. Today, you can't wait to get out of work so you can devote all your time to spoiling a dear one. Don't worry. It's normal!
white & blue & bloody red
stars and stripes for the mis-lead
convenince stores with neon lights
where burger kings rule tainted nights
stop the insanity let's end humanity
kill all earth's residents let's start with the presidents
this sick atrophic stolen land
means nothing more than modern man's
greed & hate & racism
and what we have is a fucked up system
let's stop the insanity let's end humanity
mediocre generica let's start with america
let's kill the cops, the C.I.A
the F.B.I , the P.T.A
the N.F.L, the P.M.R.C
let's kill you and let's kill me
let's stop the insanity let's end humanity
mediocre generica let's start with america
we have no rights
we have no future
no reasons why
just born to die
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[07 Feb 2005|05:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
death becomes her |
] |
have you noticed that i'm hiding behind lyrics, quotes and dreams?
who knows what creepy fucks are reading my ramblings...
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[02 Feb 2005|02:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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cynical |
] |
Whenever I’m alone with you
you make me feel Like I am home again...
However far away I will always love you
however Long I stay I will always love you
whateverWords I say I will always love you
I will always
Love you
Does he kiss your eyelids in the morning
when you start to raise your head?
And does he sing to you, incessantly,
from the space between your bed and wall?
Does he walk around all day at school
with his feet inside your shoes?
Looking down every few steps
to pretend he walks with you?
Oh, does he know that place below your neck
that's your favorite to be touched?
And does he cry through broken sentences like,
"I love you far too much"?
Does he lay awake listening to your breath?
Worried you smoke too many cigarettes?
Is he coughing now?
On a bathroom floor?
For every speck of tile
There's a thousand more
You won't ever see
But most hold inside yourself
Eternally
Well, I drug your ghost across the country
And we plotted out my death
In every city, memories would whisper
Here is where you rest
I was determined in Chicago
But I dug my teeth into my knees
And I settled for a telephone
Sang into your machine
You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
And I kissed a girl with a broken jaw
That her father gave to her
She had eyes bright enough to burn me
They reminded me of yours
And in a story told, she was a little girl
In a red-rouge, sun-bruised field
And there were rows of ripe tomatoes
Where a secret was concealed
And it rose like thunder
Clapped under our hands
And it stretched for centuries
To a diary entry's end
Where I wrote
You make me happy
Oh, when skies are gray
You make me happy
Oh, when skies are gray and gray and gray
Well the clock's heart it hangs
Inside its open chest
With its hands stretched towards
The calendar hanging itself
But I will not weep
For those dying days
For all the ones who've left
There's a few that stayed
And they found me here
And pulled me from the grass
Where I was laid
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| i'm nervous because one of my ears just started bleeding... |
[31 Jan 2005|07:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
peaceful |
] |
Blood in the streets in the town of New Haven
Blood stains the roofs and the palm trees of Venice
Blood in my love in the terrible summer
Bloody red sun of Phantastic L.A.
Blood screams the pain as they chop off her fingers
Blood will be born in the birth of a nation
Blood is the rose of mysterious union
There's blood in the streets, it's up to my ankles
Blood in the streets, it's up to my knee
Blood in the streets in the town of Chicago
Blood on the rise, it's following me
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[31 Jan 2005|11:33am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine...fine...
(It's time I had some time alone)
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| in the back of my mind a voice speaks... |
[30 Jan 2005|04:44pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 cold |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
sparta wiretap scars |
] |
Helpless isn't the right word but it's the first that comes to mind...
There's worse things than being unknown...
Think of me as days pass us by...
Shards of glass
Skin of gold
Steal my breath
Blood runs cold
Violet waves
Oceans blue
All my love
Lost in you
You wake to suffer through the day...
Trade a dream for the pay...
Well here's the fact I hope it sticks...
You're just alive out of habit...
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