Pumpkin Guts

Wed, 09 Mar 2005 04:07:49 GMT

THE END

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 02:04:46 GMT

nature created us
nature is our "god"
we have defied nature
we have pissed off our "god"
there's a super volcano underneath yellowstone national park
when it erupts america will no longer exist
this is what i live for...
i feel so inspired

Mon, 28 Feb 2005 03:45:27 GMT

me and ravyn...

=)

Sat, 26 Feb 2005 22:02:17 GMT

The days get shorter and the nights get cold.
I like the autumn but this place is getting old...
I pack up my belongings and I head for the coast.
It might not be a lot but I feel like I'm making the most.
The days get longer and the nights smell green.
I guess it's not surprising but it's spring and I should leave...

Mon, 21 Feb 2005 02:36:34 GMT

I'm in a strange mood...

I crave Chocolate, Sex and a Child of my own...

I feel so deprived...

Sun, 20 Feb 2005 03:03:06 GMT

she keeps on asking
Do you think it hurts much to die?
It's hurting so much more to stay alive now
She's going to find out how much it hurts to die...

When I came back from death
it was morning
the back door was open
and one of the buttons of my shirt had
disappeared.

-Derick Thomson
Return From Death

Should not every apartment in which man dwells be lofty enough to create some obscurity overhead, where flickering shadows may play at evening about the rafters?

-Henry David Thoreau
Walden

Sat, 19 Feb 2005 02:15:02 GMT

Ha HA!...wait, get this...
i'm hygiene leader...

...

=)

OFOTCN

Tue, 15 Feb 2005 21:51:01 GMT

"I'm fruther off than I've ever been. This is what it's like to be dead. I guess this is what it's like to be a Vegetable; you lose yourslef in the fog. You don't move. They feed your body till it finally stops eating; then they burn it. It's not so bad. There's no pain. I don't feel much of anything other than a touch of chill I figure will pass in time."

...another passage from another book...

Tue, 15 Feb 2005 16:26:01 GMT

and i'm just looking at the floor
just looking at the floor
yeah i look at the floor

and i'm starting to laugh
like an animal in pain
and i've got blood on my hands
and i've got hands in my brain
and the first short retch
leaves me gasping for more
and i stagger over screaming
on my way to the floor
and i'm back on my back
with the lights and the lies in my eyes
and the colour and the music's too loud
and my head's all the wrong size
so here i go
here i go again...

and the way the rain comes down hard
that's the way i feel inside...

i can't take it anymore
this it i've become
this is it like i get
when my life's going numb
i just keep moving my mouth
i just keep moving my feet
i say i'm loving you to death
like i'm losing my breath
and all the smiles that i wear
and all the games that i play
and all the drinks that i mix
and i drink until i'm sick
and all the faces that i make
and all the shapes that i throw
and all the people i meet
and all the words that i know
makes me sick to the heart
oh i feel so tired...

and the way the rain comes down hard
that's how i fell inside...

Mon, 14 Feb 2005 21:45:51 GMT

Haunted
by CHUCK PALAHNIUK
Release Date: May 17, 2005

with the right kind of eyes

Sun, 13 Feb 2005 21:00:34 GMT

Remember what the door mouse said: Feed Your Head...

Sat, 12 Feb 2005 02:59:41 GMT

Do you know what would happen if my mom used fabric softener? I'd DIE.

Fri, 11 Feb 2005 02:43:07 GMT

it's one of those moments
bloody screaming on the inside...
it's rather painful

"So she was turned away/To hide her face, her lips, her guilt among the trees/Even their leaves, to haunt caves of the forest/To feed her love on melancholy sorrow/Which, sleepless, turned her body to a shade/ First pale and wrinkled, then a sheet of air/Then bones, which some say turned to thin-worn rocks/And last her voice remained. Vanished in forest/ Far from her usual walks on hills and valleys/She's heard by all who call;her voice has life..."

House of Leaves
Page 42

Thu, 10 Feb 2005 02:46:45 GMT

"You see--it's a lotta baloney. It's all a lotta baloney. That's all it is nothin but a lotta baloney. Ya see, I can't help it, I can't--don't ya see? I was born dead. Not you. You wasn't born dead. Ahhh it's been hard...
Ahhhh, I...tell...ya...I tell YOU. I can't help it. I was born a miscarriage. I had so many insults I died. I was born dead. I can't help it. I'm tired. I'm give out trying. You got chances. I had so many insults i was born dead. You got it easy. I was born dead and life was hard. I'm tired. I'm tired out talking and standing up. I been dead fifty-five YEARS.
I'm...tired...
...aw-ful tired."

"Hard livin's my pleasure, my money's my own, and them that dont like me, they can leave me alone."

Wed, 09 Feb 2005 01:50:25 GMT

hiding behind horoscopes is also swell...
Capricorn
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
You absolutely don't recognize yourself lately, do you? Yesterday, you were fighting the system. Today, you can't wait to get out of work so you can devote all your time to spoiling a dear one. Don't worry. It's normal!

white & blue & bloody red
stars and stripes for the mis-lead
convenince stores with neon lights
where burger kings rule tainted nights
stop the insanity let's end humanity
kill all earth's residents let's start with the presidents
this sick atrophic stolen land
means nothing more than modern man's
greed & hate & racism
and what we have is a fucked up system
let's stop the insanity let's end humanity
mediocre generica let's start with america
let's kill the cops, the C.I.A
the F.B.I , the P.T.A
the N.F.L, the P.M.R.C
let's kill you and let's kill me
let's stop the insanity let's end humanity
mediocre generica let's start with america

we have no rights
we have no future
no reasons why
just born to die

Tue, 08 Feb 2005 02:05:38 GMT

have you noticed that i'm hiding behind lyrics, quotes and dreams?

who knows what creepy fucks are reading my ramblings...

Wed, 02 Feb 2005 21:13:27 GMT

Whenever I’m alone with you
you make me feel Like I am home again...

However far away I will always love you
however Long I stay I will always love you
whateverWords I say I will always love you
I will always
Love you

Does he kiss your eyelids in the morning
when you start to raise your head?
And does he sing to you, incessantly,
from the space between your bed and wall?
Does he walk around all day at school
with his feet inside your shoes?
Looking down every few steps
to pretend he walks with you?

Oh, does he know that place below your neck
that's your favorite to be touched?
And does he cry through broken sentences like,
"I love you far too much"?

Does he lay awake listening to your breath?
Worried you smoke too many cigarettes?
Is he coughing now?
On a bathroom floor?
For every speck of tile
There's a thousand more
You won't ever see
But most hold inside yourself
Eternally

Well, I drug your ghost across the country
And we plotted out my death
In every city, memories would whisper
Here is where you rest

I was determined in Chicago
But I dug my teeth into my knees
And I settled for a telephone
Sang into your machine

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You are my sunshine
My only sunshine

And I kissed a girl with a broken jaw
That her father gave to her
She had eyes bright enough to burn me
They reminded me of yours

And in a story told, she was a little girl
In a red-rouge, sun-bruised field
And there were rows of ripe tomatoes
Where a secret was concealed

And it rose like thunder
Clapped under our hands
And it stretched for centuries
To a diary entry's end
Where I wrote

You make me happy
Oh, when skies are gray
You make me happy
Oh, when skies are gray and gray and gray

Well the clock's heart it hangs
Inside its open chest
With its hands stretched towards
The calendar hanging itself
But I will not weep
For those dying days
For all the ones who've left
There's a few that stayed
And they found me here
And pulled me from the grass
Where I was laid

i'm nervous because one of my ears just started bleeding...

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 02:24:31 GMT

Blood in the streets in the town of New Haven
Blood stains the roofs and the palm trees of Venice
Blood in my love in the terrible summer
Bloody red sun of Phantastic L.A.
Blood screams the pain as they chop off her fingers
Blood will be born in the birth of a nation
Blood is the rose of mysterious union
There's blood in the streets, it's up to my ankles
Blood in the streets, it's up to my knee
Blood in the streets in the town of Chicago
Blood on the rise, it's following me

Mon, 31 Jan 2005 20:17:08 GMT

It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine...fine...

(It's time I had some time alone)

in the back of my mind a voice speaks...

Sun, 30 Jan 2005 23:47:18 GMT

Helpless isn't the right word but it's the first that comes to mind...
There's worse things than being unknown...

Think of me as days pass us by...
Shards of glass
Skin of gold
Steal my breath
Blood runs cold
Violet waves
Oceans blue
All my love
Lost in you

You wake to suffer through the day...
Trade a dream for the pay...
Well here's the fact I hope it sticks...
You're just alive out of habit...

Sat, 29 Jan 2005 20:49:58 GMT

On a holiday slow motion sets its pace
And it makes me pray for Capricorns sweet face
Our lives get tangled up in progress
Falling short on life's test
When all that matters should be me and you

This place is always such a mess
Sometimes I think I'd like to watch it burn
I'm so alone, and I feel just like somebody else
Man, I ain't changed, but I know I ain't the same

Sometimes a struggle builds you somehow
Tears you down, Leaves you dead
Time will pass, back to life

I held my hands, never knew how to act

Sometimes a struggle leaves you fragile
Shaken up, Shotgun shy
With heartache past, and open eyes
You'll come back stronger, Bigger, Better
Maybe this time, Things will change
Brand new day, Forgive, Forget

I guess I should be ashamed
But I forget to be vain
Well I did the best I could I guess
But everything just bleeds
They say you're only sad and lonely
And no one is impressed

Only you with time can define your life
It's yours

Sometimes I must confess
I do feel a little over dressed
Sometimes it's hard to tell the wishing from the well
Where you threw the penny and where it fell

I only wanted to believe
That angel it's me that you need

And I know you believe that you and me don't belong here
And the worst we could do
Is keep trying to pretend we care

abby normal

Fri, 28 Jan 2005 03:01:54 GMT

it's been a long time since you've been around...
laugh hard it's a long ways to the bank...

I'd like a fifth of Chivas Regal, three six packs of Heineken, a half dozen bloody marys and everything chocolate on the the menu...

Last night I turned around and thought I saw myself turning
Inside the strangest dream of life unloved and cities burning
Awake in my arms
You cry unharmed
Our age of the hours
While they still devour all

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 20:17:02 GMT

Who belongs
Who decides who’s crazy
Who rights wrongs
Where others cling

I go along
Just because I’m lazy
I go along
To be with you

I’m in love with you
So in love
I’m in love with you
I’m so in love
I’m in love with you

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 19:58:28 GMT

behind me the grace of falling snow
cover up everything you know
come save me from the awful sound
of nothing

glove: 100% polyester
lining: 100% thinsulate
machine wash lukewarm
do not use bleach or water softeners
tumble dry low
do not press, iron or steam
one size fits all
made in china
rn 88183
(you gave this to me...)

happiness will make you wonder...will i feel ok?
it's all right honey, it's all right...

i love you
it's true...

life's a bummer
when you're a hummer...
life's a drag...

but soon i'll find myself alone
too relax and fade away...

no more lies

bleed in your own light
and dream of your own life
i miss me
i miss everything i'll never be...

the moon is out the stars invite
i think i'll leave tonight...

consume my love devour my hate

do you know whats coming down
do you know i couldn't stay free
i shall be free...
i shall be free...
i shall be free...

i send this smile over to you...
my love...

caught with this virus of my mind i give in
to my disease
of my needs

MY VESTA IS IN LEO...

Fri, 21 Jan 2005 22:13:08 GMT

Your Vesta is in Leo

In typical Vesta in Leo fashion, you'll fight like a
tiger to get what you want: creative freedom,
pleasure, luxury and fun. Even more than that,
Vesta-Leo craves control. You don't like anyone
telling you what to do, and whoever's trying is no
doubt wasting their breath, as you can't be ordered
around. Creativity is very important to you, and it's
likely you'll end up in a line of work which speaks to
this creative wellspring. If you don't, if your fire
and drama are quenched, you'll be a very sad Vesta-Leo
indeed. But if you allow your creativity to shine
through, your brilliance and magnetism are such that
you'll find all around you drawn like moths to your
flame. That in itself is very important to you -- you
like to be admired for the gifts you have. But it can
be a danger, too, if you allow your intensity to burn
out the attentions of those who are made from calmer
stuff. Vesta-Leos need to have fun. You don't need a
boost to your ambitions and drive, what you need
instead is to relax a bit. You'll find you have almost
too many admirers to count, but Vesta-Leo is choosy
about whom she allows in her bed, and you won't be
swayed by someone you don't admire.